Witty Na and Breezy Sloane on a Very Windy Day at Indian Wells

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LI NA—THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING: After again beating Slovakian Dominika Cibulkova, this time to reach the semis at Indian Wells, Li Na was asked on court how her long-suffering husband “Dennis” helped her out from the friends box during her quarterfinal, Her answer: “He did nothing.”

Later, in her press conference, Li again proved that she is the (sound-bite) gift that keeps on giving, in a conversational exchange peppered with wit and whimsy:

QUESTION: Were you happy with how you played today?

LI NA: Hmm. Half and half.

Q: Do you feel different as the top seed?  Do you feel like sort of bigger and bit of a queen now?

LN: No, I feel like I’m much friendlier, you know (smiling) … I think I find more fans supporting my husband, not me. Even [when] we are practicing, working out, if he hit a winner, everyone was like so happy (smiling).

Q: Have you seen fans? I have seen fans coming to get photos with your husband.

LN: Oh, yeah? How can he do that? Really?

Q: He’s famous, and he gets photos with [your agent] Max [Eisenbud], too.

LN: Max? Wow. Okay. Max, he should lose the weight.

Q: [He needs to answer] more calls from China in the middle of the night.

LN: Yeah, yeah.

Q: So you win the French Open, and everyone says, “She’s good.” Then you win the Australian Open, and they say, “She’s really good.” What would it mean to you and to China if Li Na becomes No. 1 in the world?

LN: Wow, that means this couple years we[‘re] doing [a] good job … If I can be No. 1, that means we improve a lot. Peng Shuai has No. 1 in doubles. I need to follow her. Also, how do you say, [it shows a] positive way to the children. They will see … and hope they can do the same or even better.

Q: What do you do during the tournament when you are not playing?

LN: Long sleep, a little bit [of] warming up, then back to [the] hotel, good massage.

Q: That’s not much.

LN: I am professional.

Q: There is a wonderful new book called Ping-Pong Diplomacy. It talks about how ping-pong brought your country and my country together. It was no accident that it was planned by the top leaders, Mao, Nixon. Are you familiar with that at all? Have you heard about that and how ping-pong brought the two countries together?

LN: (Shakes head) Maybe when they make the book [for] tennis I will look in that (smiling).

Q: Is marriage like a doubles team, a doubles partnership? You fight, sometimes you get together, sometimes you break up.

LN: I don’t know how you say [it] in America, but in China, they always say, “Doesn’t matter [what] your choice, marriage [is] always wrong.” So the best way [is to] just keep wrong until the end. I just follow that.

Q: Is that why you don’t play doubles?

LN:  No, I think [in] doubles, for me, the court [is] too small, you know.

JUST WONDERING: Inch for inch, is Dominika Cibulkova the best woman player in the world?

A CELEBRATION OF THE OBVIOUS: When asked to talk about his next opponent, the most chronicled player in the game, Mr. Roger Federer, Alexandr Dolgopolov said, “Roger has been around. Roger is Roger.” When pressed to describe what makes Federer special, he replied, “Maybe 17 Grand Slams?”

It is better to show them to people then to throw them in the litter box. It is usually one pair of shoes per match.

NEWLYWED SLOANE’S CAMPING TRIP: Sloane Stephens lost a tight three-set battle in windstorm conditions to Flavia Pennetta today, but she was relatively unruffled in the press room, keeping the conversation light and breezy. Witness this exchange:

QUESTION: What were you happy about in your game the whole tournament?

SLOANE STEPHENS: Just happy that I’m improving and happier on court and just enjoying myself.  Like it’s not the end of the world that I lost today. I’m okay with that.

Just going to keep improving and having fun. My birthday party is on Saturday, so I’m going to go have a good party and just enjoy life. It’s not a big deal.

Q: Target?

SS: Yeah, I registered at Target (smiling). I’m in the wedding registry, which is so—I’m marrying my mom. Like when [the screen] pops up, it says, “Sloane and Sybille’s big day is eight days away.”

I just had to name one person. I was going to marry myself, but I couldn’t put my same name. I ended up having to [use] my mom’s.

Q: Did you get to run around with the gun, or you did it online?

SS: No, I did it all online, so it was super easy. Like I saw the e‑mail that my mom sent to everyone to inform them, because I was just going to send out a mass text.

She said, “Dear everyone, Sloane has married me on Target. You have to go to the wedding registry to find her sometething or whatever. She’s very strange. Known her since she was little. Just buy her a gift.” I’m like, “Thanks.” That was the whole e‑mail.

No, I’m excited about it. I got two gifts so far. I have like 35 things on the list.

Q: How many are you hoping to get?

SS:  All 35. Yeah. I think it’s going to be tough to get the camper.  Like I put a three‑bedroom tent in there (smiling). They have this luxurious RV-like camp. You can rent an RV and they also assemble your tents for you, but it’s like a Four Seasons, so there are showers and stuff. It’s cool. I’m looking forward to it.

Q: You don’t strike me as very outdoorsy.

SS: I’m not. That’s why we are going to a Four Seasons. I’m looking forward to it.

SNARLY PRESS COMMENTARY OF THE DAY: One unsympathetic writer observed that the windblown Flavia PennettaSloane Stephens quarterfinal was “all about ineptitude, with a little mediocrity thrown in.”

HOW COOL IS THAT? Rod Laver could be seen fixing Bud Collins‘ green sweater before an on-court ceremony honoring Charlie Passarell. Also on site was Passarell’s dad, Charles Passarell, who is 96.

AND THE JOHN BOEHNER MEDALLION FOR BEST TAN IN TENNIS GOES TO: Butch Buchholz, Charlie Passarell, or Rafa Nadal?

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