NO KIDDING: Larissa Bubecki claimed that “Melbourne’s
summer of tennis doesn’t start until Sharapova has posed with a koala or
one of the Williams’ has been pictured in a bikini.”
WAR OF THE GESTURES: Jimmy Connors claimed he “founded” the fist-pump. Agassi bowed Buddha-like to the four corners of the court, only to have a real Buddhist, Thai Paradorn Srichaphan, show how it was really done. After the Bryan Bros. perfected the leapin’ chest bump, virtually the entire NBA adapted the move. Now Lleyton Hewitt is trying to trademark the semi-bizarre “Vicht” hand gesture, which is identical to the gesture once popularized by Mats Wilander and fellow Swedish players. The Swedes failed to renew their trademark, which allowed Lleyton to claim it for his own.
THE BOYS OF SUMMER ARE ALIVE AND WELL: After commenting on Brad Gilbert’s less-than-sublime linguistics skill (Do you know this kid, “Dam-A-Chow-Ska.”) Mary Carillo added that Brad makes every tennis player sound like he played for the Brooklyn Dodgers.
UNVARNISHED VIEW I: Jon Wertheim offered an unsparing view of Roddick: “The book on how to beat him is not only out but it’s dog-eared and tattered: Work the backhand, invite him to approach, let him self-destruct. The other problem is his comportment...Telling the crowd to “shut up” and calling a grown adult an “idiot” is just weak, petty stuff. It’s right out of the Jimmy Connors self-pity, you-against-the-world primer.”
Unvarnished View II: Greg Baum claimed that “Sharapova has always been easy to admire, hard to love...and takes inordinately long to serve. Her father, Yuri, personified the ugly sporting parent. Her mother, Yelena, sounded more pleasant, but never came.”
TERMS OF ENDEARMENT:
• One Aussie commentator called Sharapova a “glamazon.”
• The Aussies call an unseeded player who goes deep into
the draw a “bolter.”
• Down-Under Mama and Aussie resident Pam Shriver explained that the Aussie phrase “spit the dummy” refers to infants who spits out their pacifiers.
AND THE CAT STEVENS ‘MORNING HAS BROKEN’ MATCH OF THE CENTURY IS: The Lleyton Hewitt-Marcos Baghdatis match, which started just before midnight, finished at 4:34 a.m.
BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS: Commenting on the Lleyton Hewitt/Marcos Baghdatis match, Lisa Dillman wrote, "Forget Breakfast at Wimbledon, how about Breakfast at Melbourne Park?"...After noting that there are four towering Croatians in the top 100 Martina Navratilova asked, "What are they eating over there for breakfast?"
NAMEs YOU GOTTA LOVE: Greek Konstantinos Economidis and Ferry Dusika Hallenstadion—the Viennese cycling velodrome where the Austria vs. U.S. Davis Cup tie was played in February.
MAKES SENSE: When ESPN was looking for a couple of reasons why Davenport came back, it speculated, “Svetlana Kuznetsova at No. 2, and Jelena Jankovic at No. 3. There are two reasons.”
36 HOURS OF BLISS: Midway through the Aussie Open, the tournament blossomed with perhaps the most compelling 36 mid-tournament hours in Grand Slam memory. Mardy Fish imploded, Phillip Kohlschreiber stunned Roddick, second-seed Svetlana Kuznetsova went and a tearful Anna Chakvetadze (who was still getting over the robbery and assault she suffered in her Moscow home) went down. Blake scored a stunning five-set win over Sebastien Grosjean, and 19-year-old Croat Marin Cilic upset last year’s A.O. finalist Fernando Gonzalez. To top it all, Federer had the greatest mid-tournament escape of his career when he finally subdued the generously tattooed and very unafraid Serb Janko Tipsarevic.
RANKING HAS ITS PRIVILEGE: Sam Querrey noted that tour comic Novak Djokovic has yet to mimic him, but concluded, “I don’t think you really imitate guys if they’re not in the top 10.”
THANK GOD THERE AIN’T NO PESKY PYRAMIDS OR TAJ MAHALS ‘ROUND HERE TO DISTRACT ME: In Melbourne, lanky ‘n’ loveable Querrey, 20, said “My coach lived in Melbourne. So he's here with his wife, parents and their friends. They can show me around. It's just a nice city. I'm not a big sightseer. And sometimes when you go to Europe, you have to see the Eiffel Tower and places like that. You don't have to see anything here, and I like that.”
THE TAMING OF THE BEAST: After an era of seeing Jimmy Connors on court — on the prowl, fierce, intense and in-your-face — it’s downright eerie to see him stuck in the Friends Box, sitting there passive and docile, looking like a deer stuck in the headlights as his pupil Roddick once again gets thumped.
Best Broadcast Analysis: During Blake’s five-set match against Grosjean, Pat McEnroe noted, “Americans are unable to change from offense to defense within a point. They don’t have a transition game and don’t control the tempo of a point up to three or four times within a point. The French are taught that. They get point construction when they’re growing up...and they’re taught good techniques. They know that there are times to play high-risk, and times to play defense. Blake doesn’t know what to expect. Grosjean sometimes goes for a huge return and sometimes he just pushes it back.” Mary Carillo added. “Blake just muscles it and gets it back. High-risk tennis has not worked out well versus a smart guy, not if you can’t overpower him.” Okay, point well taken. But, muscleman Blake prevailed and got the “W,” thank you very much. Plus, he pulled off his first two five-set wins at Slams and two critical four-setters in Davis Cup play over the past five months.
AUDACITY UNLEASHED: After Djokovic hit a brilliant shot, Carillo quipped, “Who does he think he is, Tsonga?”
ALI REPRISE: Muhammad Ali look-alike Jo-Wilfried Tsonga, said, "I'm not flying on the court like him, but I try to fly (like a butterfly)."
MOST BORING CRITIQUE: Cliff Drysdale said that recently retired Dane Kenneth Carlsen "was REALLY boring to watch."
JUST WONDERING: Is McEnroe's new ("It was out, no it was in") cereal commercial, just another example of how he's by far the most adept public figure in turning a negative image into a positive…Was that makeshift, chalky clay court they played the U.S. vs. Austria Davis Cup tie on in Vienna, the worst court ever for a major match?
IS HIS ATP CLOCK IS TICKING?: Luke Jensen contended that Roddick had to win his Aussie Open match against little-known Philipp Kohlschreiber because "he only has a few more shots at winning Slams, and he can't let this one go."
SURE, THIS IS THE 'HAPPY SLAM,' But ...: Heavy securty die to ethnic tension and police excess shadowed the Aussie Open.
SIGNS OF THE TIMES: “Singa Tsonga” and “Quiet please, Maria.”
THE TABLES ALWAYS TURN: With the exception of Steffi Graf, few have been more dominant in the first or second round of big tournaments than Lindsay Davenport. Time and again she would crush over-matched foes, giving up precious few games. But in Melbourne, she was dismissed by Maria Sharapova 6-1,6-3. Soon after, in the Fed Cup, Dav lost to the lowly German teen Sabine Lisicki, ranked No. 130.) But not to worry, not only is the future Hall of Famer Davenport playing with house money, with the prize money she won in Australia she surpassed Graf in career prize money of $21,897,501.
BABY TALK: Reflecting on Davenport's stunning loss in the Fed Cup, the AP noted, "That cup was supposed to be Lindsay Davenport's baby."
REFLECTIONS ON OUR ‘BABE’ [AND WE DON’T MEAN RUTH]: Reflecting on Sharapova’s win over Davenport, Michael Gleeson quipped, “In the match of the mother and the babe, mum lost.”
DISTRESS CALL?: There just might be a way for the Williams sisters to avoid suspension next year for again skipping Indian Wells — which they vowed they will never play — if they claim emotional distress. Apparently, there's a loophole in the rulebook and, if that's the case, the sisters will drive a truck through it.
DON'T WHISPER 'DEM WORDS IN INDIAN WELLS: Pam Shriver contended, "Tournaments are always happier when both Williams are in it."
GOOLAGONG BUT NOT FORGOTTEN: These days, we’re used to athletes having to give back their titles or medals due to scandal (like the $51,000 Martina Hingis won at Wimbledon). But here’s a twist — some long-lost records were just revealed that Aussie Evonne Goolagong became, for a brief stretch some 30 years ago, No. 1 in the world.
give that granny a hug: Casey Dellaqua’s endearing grandma, who cheered and cried in the stands while wearing an Aussie flag in her hair. And, why not? Her granddaughter who before the tournament bought her clothes at Target, left the tournament with a six-figure payday.
ARE WE ON CENTER COURT OR IN CHURCH?: During a Roddick match, the ump told the crowd, “Please remain quiet during the service.”
ONE HECK OF AN UNDERSTANDING GUY: In a caring moment of thoughtfulness, Roddick told an ump, “I’m going to speak very slowly so you can understand.”
‘DEM WERE DA DAYS: Jamie Baker called for the Aussie Open’s outer courts to be supplied with port-o-potties so that the interminable delays which undermine the atmosphere of matches are changed. All this prompted Carillo to reminisce, “Remember when the players did not have to go to the bathroom during a match?”
DIAPER DANDY: Midway through Davenport’s second-round loss, Shriver quipped, “Unless this match turns around, Lindsay is going to look forward to going home and changing a few diapers.”
HOW QUICKLY THEY FORGET: When Cliff Drysdale asked boothmate Darren Cahill to name the last French Open champ to have also won the Aussie Open, Cahill answered, “Carlos Moya?” Wrong! It was Cahill’s former pupil, Andre Agassi.
SAY IT ISN’T SO: Three fans were kicked out of the WTA tourney in Antwerp for using their computers to place bets… For the first time in the Open Era, no Americans got past the Aussie Open quarters in singles, doubles or mixed.
ONCE AGAIN, THERE’S SOMETHING FISHY ‘BOUT MARDY: While trying to right his once-promising career (after it was stalled by an injury suffered while trying a field goal barefoot), Mardy Fish parlayed an inconsequential decision by the ump into a mighty implosion which promptly derailed his A.O. run.
COLD COMFORT: Jarkko Nieminen prepared for the A.O. by doing his military service, which included sleeping in a tent in the snow-filled Finnish forest.
BRIT'S BLUES: Australia used to be a glorious jewel in the crown of the British Empire. But in Melbourne, Andy Murray lost in the first round of the singles and Jamie Murray lost in the first round of the dubs, so French folks were quick to note that early on, there were 29 French players in the Open and no Brits.
SHOW UP AND SHOUT! After Australia evened up their Davis Cup tie in Serbia, Novak Djokovic grabbed the P.A. microphone and implored the crowd, "If you come out tomorrow, you better come back and support the team," and then threw down the mic...Djokovic's mime routines are side-splitting, but off court he's pretty somber.
man of the people: The self-publicizing Vince Spadea might get under some people’s skin, but after her won his 11th five setter on an outer court, he said: “It was awesome, people with painted faces, there was so much chanting. I feel like I died and went to heaven. I was slapping high fives, people coming out of the woodwork to interview me. I felt like Jimmy Connors, but it was more like a park where I paid people to come over.”
HOW TIMES HAVE CHANGED: We sometimes forget how things change. On Jan. 21, which was Martin Luther King Day, many a media outlet featured King's speeches. A CNN debate featured an African-American running for president and ESPN 2's Australian Open coverage featured Serena Williams, an interview with James Blake, a brief broadcast essay by Bud Collins on Althea Gibson's emergence and how it related to race relations and Dr. King.
WHAT A DIFFERENCE A YEAR MAKES: Sharapova was crushed by Serena in the ‘07 Aussie Open final as she was able to win just three games. But this year she turned it around and crushed Ivanovic to win the '08 title. Still, after her loss in '07, she was still ranked No. 1. This year, after she won, she was “only” ranked No. 5.
QUESTION OF THE YEAR [SO FAR]: Will the Aussie Open loss by Roger Federer -- be a sea change in men's tennis?
MOST CREATIVE EXPLANATION: Federer explained why his serving was not that strong in the semis by saying that, “Maybe I serve too many aces against Tipseravic. I didn't have much left.”
POWER, HANDS, TOUCH, SYNCHRONIZATION, EXPERIENCE: The Bryan Bros.
THE GREATEST MENACE IN TENNIS: Of the Bryan Bros., Leif Shiras said, “Everything floating they treat with menace.”
GIVING NEW MEANING TO THE PHRASE MIDDLE KINGDOM: The Bryan Bros. are 14-1 on the middle Saturday of Davis Cup play when the doubles are played.
TALL STAT: When Ivo Karlovic (6-foot-10) and John Isner (6-foot-9) played doubles together they brought out 163 inches of humanity on court, but nonetheless lost semi-meekly.
THE NEW KID ON THE BLOCK?: Aussie junior, Bernie Tomic, 15, became the youngest male to ever win a junior Grand Slam when he won the A.O. boys’ crown.
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FLOWER POWER: The boss of Serbian tennis said his country’s players “are like flowers in the desert. They grow in the middle of desperation. Their patriotism, commitment and their charm is their contribution.”
ONLY IN TENNIS: A Serbian guy wins the mixed doubles with a Chinese woman over two Indians on an Australian court provided by an American company.
REMEMBRANCE: Last year, en route to her Aussie Open victory, Serena was inspired by recalling the memory of her murdered half-sister Yetunde. This year, Sharapova was inspired by the passing of her coach’s mother, Jane Joyce.
FAREWELL, GLORIA KRAMER: Gloria Loraine Kramer, the wife of legendary Hall of Famer Jack Kramer and the matriarch of L.A.’s grandest tennis family, died of natural causes on February 13. The mother of five sons – Bob, David, John, Michael and Ron – and the grandmother of seven, she was 84 and had been married for a mere 63 years. A beloved figure, “Grandma Foo-Foo” (who had the best tennis nick-name this side of Bumpy Fraser) lived life to the fullest from her Rosie-the-Riveter type job in World War II to actively volunteering, teaching Sunday school and cruising Westwood in her signature bright, pink Thunderbird. Her husband loved to tell the story of how he once told Gloria that they didn’t have that much money, so she had to cool it with all her shopping. So, Gloria asked, “Why don’t we have that much money?” Jack replied, “I haven’t been winning that much lately,” prompting his wife to respond, “Well, get out there and win some more.”
Go Figure: The day a prominent tennis publication hit the stands with the story that Monica Seles would reemerge big time, the Serbian-American announced her retirement...There were no Williams sisters, Henin or Nadal in the Aussie Open’s final weekend...Some tagged the ultra-confident Novak Djokovic as arrogant. (Not true.) On the other hand, Federer’s pretty lofty ’tude is rarely called out...Writer Richard Hines wondered whether the women should be paid more than the men...Serena has lost four straight times in the quarters of majors and has never defended one of her Grand Slam championships... Daniela Hantuchova accused Ana Ivanovic of purposely squeaking her shoes as a distraction...Nadal committed just four unforced errors in the first two sets of his semis loss to Tsonga, yet didn’t come close to having a chance...It wasn’t the Bryan Bros. or the Williams sisters who made a splash in Melbourne. It was the Ukranian Bondarenko sisters who won the women’s dubs.
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